a bit of backgound info................my husband and i, after being in the org for 20 , high pressured years, faded about 4 years ago and after the usual feelings , anger, sadness, joy etc we had quite a upsetting change of circumstances.
recently my husband told me he didnt think he was in love with me anymore, decided he had missed out on what he really wanted to do with his life.
he wants to get a high powered motor bike, go off and get new friends ( i have no objection but hes blamed me cos he hasnt got any) and now has got a big tatoo on his arm from the shoulder to the elbow.. ive never been really keen on tatoos but sort of gave my inital reluctant support and actually went with him when he had it done!!.
IP You are right, there is a big problem. I just dont know how to handle it. Im trying to ride along with it, if hes just feeling unsure at the moment I dont want to create more issues.
But its like living with a spoiled teenager at the moment and hes treating me as if im his mum, Something I dont want to be.
a bit of backgound info................my husband and i, after being in the org for 20 , high pressured years, faded about 4 years ago and after the usual feelings , anger, sadness, joy etc we had quite a upsetting change of circumstances.
recently my husband told me he didnt think he was in love with me anymore, decided he had missed out on what he really wanted to do with his life.
he wants to get a high powered motor bike, go off and get new friends ( i have no objection but hes blamed me cos he hasnt got any) and now has got a big tatoo on his arm from the shoulder to the elbow.. ive never been really keen on tatoos but sort of gave my inital reluctant support and actually went with him when he had it done!!.
A bit of backgound info................my husband and I, after being in the org for 20 , high pressured years, faded about 4 years ago and after the usual feelings , anger, sadness, joy etc we had quite a upsetting change of circumstances. Recently my husband told me he didnt think he was in love with me anymore, decided he had missed out on what he really wanted to do with his life. He wants to get a high powered motor bike, go off and get new friends ( I have no objection but hes blamed me cos he hasnt got any) and now has got a big tatoo on his arm from the shoulder to the elbow.
Ive never been really keen on tatoos but sort of gave my inital reluctant support and actually went with him when he had it done!!
Now hes booked in to have the other arm done. Im really upset. No disscussion of the money being spend (£ 200 each tatto ) no consideration that I think it will look horrible.
He says its a personal thing he wants to do for himself and that it has nothing to do with me.
I told him I think hes going through a mid life crisis, which he obviously disagrees with.
So the question is am I being unreasonable here or is he?? Would you have done something as permenant as a tatoo if your partner disagreed with it or is it up to ultimately up to you.
I clear my bag out all the time but its still full
Makeup bag, little book (for writing lists and notes), pen, purse, phone, cheque book,sweetners, tissues, anti hystamines, anadin, vaseline lip barm, keys, tape measure, loads of appointment cards, all old, diet book, diary, stamps, inhailer, calculator, doggie poo bags, yellow post it pad.
what i mean is, ones who loved the meetings and field service.
ones who loved telling a person why they dont celebrate christmas, birthdays etc etc.........................ones who thought it wonderful that their children missed out on so much, and stood out in school and became a target for bullying.. i myself did everthing because i was terrified of the big "a" and so thought everything was worth it.
but i hated going to meetings, hated going on fs, hating not celebtating christmas and never really excepted the birthday thing.
What I mean is, ones who loved the meetings and field service. Ones who loved telling a person why they dont celebrate Christmas, birthdays etc etc.........................ones who thought it wonderful that their children missed out on so much, and stood out in school and became a target for bullying.
I myself did everthing because I was terrified of the big "A" and so thought everything was worth it. But I hated going to meetings, hated going on FS, hating not celebtating christmas and never really excepted the birthday thing. Their where so many red flags that I ignored cos I thought it was the truth.
I know wonder how many in my congregation felt the same and secretly want it not to be true and get out.
i am not trying to prove anything from what i am about to say.
for me there is nothing that is provable at the moment.
i dont do belief.
I just wish God was a little more honest and tell it like it is. Instead we have to base everything we see on "belief",,,,belief that he actually exists !!! Why would a loving creator not explain himself, show himself, so that his creation have the truth about what is going on. Why would a loving creator do everything in secret, so that we have to read a ridiculous book called the bible.
If God exists ( I tend to think not nowadays) why would he test us vuneralble humans who dont have the whole picture and have our whole salvation dependant on what other humans tell us what is going on.
my husband and i have very successfully faded for about 3 years.
we would dearly love my daughter and her husband to question and research the organization and find the truth for themselves.. they know we dont go anymore and have issues.
but its become a taboo subject with the s-i-l after a discussion about child abuse, where he made it obvious he didnt like the the org being "criticised".
My husband and I have very successfully faded for about 3 years. we would dearly love my daughter and her husband to question and research the organization and find the truth for themselves.
They know we dont go anymore and have issues. But its become a taboo subject with the S-I-L after a discussion about child abuse, where he made it obvious he didnt like the the org being "criticised"
So I thought that i would suggest that if they read crisis of conscience and we would discuss it, then I would go to meetings for a set amount of time. Do you think this would work???
Imput wanted
(by the way, my hubby is appalled by this idea and would never go to another meeting, I feel anything is worth a chance)
im sure all of us at one time or another witnessed homes that broke our heartshere are a few of mine.
some of the homes i had been invited into out in service really left an impression on me.
call it naive or whatever, it was a real eye opener in some cases.. one in particular that i remember was a poor family with 8 little girls, stair step in age, the oldest no more than 9. this was an rv of the sister i was with.... very nice people, but the living conditions were appalling.
I remember going on a bible study with a pioneer, the house was really dirty. Then while the owner was out of the room I was shown a big stain in the middle of the floor which was apparently blood, caused by the daughter stabbing her boyfriend a week before, it had never been cleaned up!
Then the kids came home and started eating stuff off the floor, I started heaving really bad and had to make an excuse to leave. I told the sister that I couldnt go with her again and that I really admired her dedication............she just started talking about how many hours she got visiting there every week. I was amazed she would go there every week just to tot up the hours.
What do YOU think ?
haven't been around lately, but life is great.
rarely think about the witnesses these days and my mental health is getting better and better.
was listening to triple m (a radio station here) and the dj was doing a talk back segment about how annoying it is to have witnesses etc.
The problem is, the WT will use it as either persecution, or if other religions are included, that the goverment is turning on religion. Which is something they have been saying will happen just before the Great tribulation.
Think how many inactive or exJws who dont know the truth and still think it is, will flood back to the WT.
It may help a few people not get involved or a lot who get fed up ( me included) with the knocking, but I think this would help the WT not hinder it.
i am very impressed by all of the new folks that have been swhoing up lately.
it wasn't that so long ago that i too was new here.
in fact, i still considr myself a newbie.
Im not really a newby................but Im starting fresh, I dont feel the same as I did a few years ago when I joined.
Ive let a few here know who I am, and as I would like to bring some of my family here I dont want my posting history read by them. It wasnt anything bad but I just feel we should be on a level playing field......................so my old avatar is now redundant ......................!!
